You know those days that from the moment you awake, you just know its going to be a lossy day because of whatever reasons. Well that was my day today. When I wake up before my alarm clock goes off from pain I know not only will I be miserable but I'll be dragging myself threw the day. lets just say thank goodness I wasn't stuck in classes until 7 pm today. However as the day continued I just kept finding myself more sad and just having enough of this illness. I'm beginning to lose hope by the doses. Everyday life I just find so frustrating. I keep pushing myself to go out or over to places even just low key and I find myself regretting it the next day. I keep trying to act like I'm living a completely normal life when I think I'm really starting to contribute to the pain and sickness in my body. I just feel so lame when friends beg me to go out or even come over. Even though I look perfectly healthy for the most part on the outside, inside its a living nightmare. I just feel so alone on this whole thing. This is one of my lowest points I have felt. Like I said losing hope by the minute. Especially knowing I'm the one percent chance of something like this even happening. 

After class I always have to take cat naps from how tired and sick treatment makes me. I received a call from my cousin Adam, which who he, himself has gone threw a lot...but this convo was enough to change my day around. It just felt so good to converse with someone who knew exactly how I feel and knowing that there is hope out there. It may seem something really small but it was enough to make me smile. =)

Well I'm still feeling really sick from treatment its been 3 days now since. So hopefully in the next few days I'll start feeling better before this weeks treatment. Now its time for me to go back to my design homework and work with some more color-aid....yahooo =/